Secret Confessions

[Doomy]

[Edited Because I Fracking Can]

Welcome to the Secret Confessions thread. Beyond the pure anonymity of the internet, there lies a certain level of understanding behind all the accounts here on FF. The SC account carries burden of allowing the user to give a candid, private confession with (hopefully) understanding feedback. The SC thread is for other posters to give kind and/or helpful advice, words of empathy, or a secret of their own (under the SC name or not).

This account is a group account, and EVERYONE needs to treat it respectfully. By posting under the Secret Confessor, you are pledging to refrain from hate mail, "finger-pointing", insulting and being a jerkface. By posting in the SC thread, you are pledging to keep the comments respectful. This has not yet been a problem, but it's nice to have written down "just in case".

If you would like to use the SC account for ANY reason beside posting in this thread, please PM me- even if it's under the SC name (this is not to exert authority, but to maintain order over a very accessible account).

Thank you!


email/login:
[e-mail]
Password: secret

[Secret Confessor]

I don't get you.

At first I assumed you were just trying to be nice, partially because you knew I helped people with homework a lot. Then you started acting like an actual friend who wasn't just associating with me for homework purposes. And for the first time ever, I think I might've actually liked a guy. Mainly because you started to act like you liked me.

Then you asked out someone else to that stupid dance.

I felt like an idiot. A real genuine idiot. And I dropped my feelings for you in an instant.

Especially after you became distant. And then suddenly you start getting close to me again. I assumed it was just because you wanted to be friends. Then you started saying how we should hang out during the summer and other things like that.

I refused to let myself assume that you liked me. And you know what? I was right.

I don't want to be called, "babe" by you or be complimented at all from you. Or be asked to go with you to somewhere.

Every time you do it, I just feel like another girl in your list. How many of my friends have you said this to? I know you're trying to be nice and friendly, but quite frankly I feel insulted.

I don't feel special or pretty. I just feel like I'm being pitied. And I hate that the most.

At first I was sad that we wouldn't be going to the same school. But now I realize I'm actually happy about it. Soon enough we'll be strangers. And I won't have to take your pity anymore. And I won't stay up at night wondering what the hell you meant.

[Hannah]

Well, he's gone now, right? Good riddens.

[Secret Confessor]

I've never considered myself a jealous person.

Until today.

[Secret Confessor]

I have a razor in my hand right now. It's scary how amazing it looks to me right now. I just keep wondering who would cry if I decided that enough was enough. I already know the answer though. No one would. No one actually cares. It's all lie.

You know what else is a lie? The fact that I keep telling people I'm fine. It's amazing that they believe me. Obviously it's the best lie in the world if I can fool everybody. Or maybe I'm just really good at acting like I'm fine. People are really good actors if they can fool their so-called "best friends" into thinking everything is fine when clearly it's not. When the only thing you dream of is lying in a pool of your own blood.

I want to do it right now. I want to end it. I'm going to give up.

[Lamp Post]

I would. v.v

[Secret Confessor]

You have no idea who I am so why would you cry?

[Lamp Post]

I'm close to everyone here, pretty much. Whether we're good friends, not too close, or even if we're not on the best terms - I seriously care about all of you.

[Megan (Fishy)]

I would, too.

And, because if anyone on this site died, I would cry. Maybe I'm not close to everyone here, but this is a small community. It'd be upsetting knowing we could've helped you but we didn't have the chance, and it'd be upsetting to lose someone. No matter who you are I'd cry.

Please don't do it.

[o0_flying high_0o]

^ This. v.v

I may not know who you are, but there is no one from this site it wouldn't be horrid to lose. We love you, please don't give up.

[Hannah]

I would cry as well. Any of you, all of you, are worth to much to end this way. Most of you I don't know hardly at all, but you seem wonderful and I wish I did.

You're lying to yourself. Stop it. In reality, you're just being a real bitch to yourself. And look what it's doing to you. You wouldn't say 'no one would care if you died' to someone else, so why are you telling yourself that?

EDIT: Sorry, that last part seems really cold. It's true though.

[Secret Confessor]

For fuck's sake, no one's asking you to like me. To be my friend. To pretend you give a toss.

But, seriously, you're not ten years old anymore. If you're going to sit with my group (and yes, they're my group, not yours, whatever else you might like to believe) then /some/ courtesy is required.

You're immature. And, dammit, it makes me feel like an idiot, but, yes, your terribly immature, tiny little jabs sting a bit.

You've left me in a rather awkward situation, you know. I think I'm meant to be making a cake, in order to participate in Cake Day. In order to celebrate your birthday. I'm not going to, though. You've already indicated you don't want to celebrate your birthday with me. I mean, normally when you're having a party of considerable size, which yours is, there are some niceties one should observe. An example of this is, if you're inviting a whole group its simply impolite to exclude one individual. You don't have to hang out with them. Once you've upwards of 80 people, you're not going to see them all anyway. If they're in your group, it's generally a given they'll be invited. Unless of course, it's a deliberate snub....

Thank you, darling, it's always nice to have my ego checked, anyway.

*laughs* Fuck you, you fucking bitch. You don't get any banana cake.

I love how you think defriending me on facebook will somehow make that even clearer. Make even more of a point. I got it already, now you just look ridiculous.

Grow up, please. I'm tired of dealing with you.

*is terribly obvious, particularly to certain people, but after typing all this in this account I can't be bothered switching back*

[RantingSidekick]

"Fuck you, you fucking bitch. You don't get any banana cake."
I think that says it all, really.

I'm sorry she's such a snot. I'm glad you've finally made up your mind.