Secret Confessions

[Doomy]

[Edited Because I Fracking Can]

Welcome to the Secret Confessions thread. Beyond the pure anonymity of the internet, there lies a certain level of understanding behind all the accounts here on FF. The SC account carries burden of allowing the user to give a candid, private confession with (hopefully) understanding feedback. The SC thread is for other posters to give kind and/or helpful advice, words of empathy, or a secret of their own (under the SC name or not).

This account is a group account, and EVERYONE needs to treat it respectfully. By posting under the Secret Confessor, you are pledging to refrain from hate mail, "finger-pointing", insulting and being a jerkface. By posting in the SC thread, you are pledging to keep the comments respectful. This has not yet been a problem, but it's nice to have written down "just in case".

If you would like to use the SC account for ANY reason beside posting in this thread, please PM me- even if it's under the SC name (this is not to exert authority, but to maintain order over a very accessible account).

Thank you!


email/login:
[e-mail]
Password: secret

[Megan (Fishy)]

I don't know why they used the Sac feed for it....

[Secret Confessor]

I keep having like breakdowns. I scream in my pillow every night and then cry my eyes out , get up in the morning , go to school, go home , yell at my family, go to bed, and do it all over. Its like destroying me. I can't sleep. I don't eat. I barely talk at school anymore. My friends drifted from me slowly. I'm sick of it.

[Doomy]

You need a hug :(

*Hugs*

I hope things get better for you- you have our support!

[Secret Confessor]

I hate having to make decisions about my life. At least, the big decisions, like what I'm doing next year and the year after and so on. What for breakfast, or what to wear...not so much.

So i put off those big decisions and then I miss out on things.

And I hate that because it feels like I'm wasting my life. And then I get depressed and want to kill myself. And then I feel ridiculous for being so fucking melodramatic. And then I really want to kill myself.

[Throne_Spaz]

Do not kill yourself..

[Secret Confessor]

I'm ashamed of who I am and even more ashamed of who I used to be. I don't feel like I can deal with anything that happens anymore and I'm really scared I'm going to have a massive breakdown and do or say something really horrible that I'll regret later. I feel cut off from everyone, like everybody knows a secret that I don't. It feels like everyone is avoiding talking to me and I can't relate to people. I know this confession is stupid, unfair and untrue but I had to get it out.

[o0_flying high_0o]

*hugs* We're here. And we're more than happy to talk to you, whoever you are.

[Secret Confessor]

I just don't care any more. I constantly feel disconnected and out of it, and I just can't be bothered to fix it. I'm losing touch with my friends, despite seeing them everyday, because actually working on some sort of relationship requires too much effort. My school work is slipping dangerously, but I'm just tired of it all. I should care, but I can't help thinking it all seems kind of pointless. Life seems kind of pointless. So why bother with it?

[EndOfTheEarth]

Because I know what happens when you die. I figured it out in 10th grade English. Believe me, life is much more interesting and has way much more of a point than death does.
Yes, relationships take up a lot of time and require a lot of effort. This is true with every serious one. My reccomendation, don't worry about it, unless you're not serious about the romance, in which case dump the person already.

[Secret Confessor]

I wasn't talking about a romantic relationship, just friendships. Sorry, poor wording on my part.

Since I'm replying any way, the point of life is to survive as long as you can. Ultimately, you're always going to lose. What point is there in prolonging the pain and suffering? In building up relationships that can only end badly?

[EndOfTheEarth]

The point of life is not to survive as long as you can-- if that were the case natural selection would have evolved us as a bunch of solar-powered bomb-proof tortoises.
Rather, the point of life is to survive and get as much as possible done.
And again, the pain and suffering is much better than death. Once I figured out what it was I was distracted for the rest of the day, and on the rare occasion where I consider it myself, I remind myself what would happen, decide life is far more interesting, and try to get done those things that I haven't finished yet.

If you can't come up with "get as much as possible done" in your mind, just make a list in your head of your personal goals, even if they relate to you in even the least significant way.
Here's some of mine as an example:
-Get Married
-Raise a family
-Publish at least one novel
-Live long enough to witness human settlements on the moon

[Secret Confessor]

I'm dying inside.
I'm afraid of everything.
The only time I'mhappy is when I see her.