Secret Confessions

[Doomy]

[Edited Because I Fracking Can]

Welcome to the Secret Confessions thread. Beyond the pure anonymity of the internet, there lies a certain level of understanding behind all the accounts here on FF. The SC account carries burden of allowing the user to give a candid, private confession with (hopefully) understanding feedback. The SC thread is for other posters to give kind and/or helpful advice, words of empathy, or a secret of their own (under the SC name or not).

This account is a group account, and EVERYONE needs to treat it respectfully. By posting under the Secret Confessor, you are pledging to refrain from hate mail, "finger-pointing", insulting and being a jerkface. By posting in the SC thread, you are pledging to keep the comments respectful. This has not yet been a problem, but it's nice to have written down "just in case".

If you would like to use the SC account for ANY reason beside posting in this thread, please PM me- even if it's under the SC name (this is not to exert authority, but to maintain order over a very accessible account).

Thank you!


email/login:
[e-mail]
Password: secret

[RantingSidekick]

No, I'm not upset. Far from it.

Ask Josh Swain about me being silly. He will tell you.

[Megan (Fishy)]

XD

He's funny, in your status comments, he's outstalking all of us though...

[RantingSidekick]

Completely, he's fantastic.

In RL, I overuse the word silly, so much that every time someone /else/ says the word "silly", someone yells out my name.
And I am a very silly person in general.

My one issue I'm trying to deal with with Swain right now is that I think /he/ thinks we're quasi-dating, when in reality I'm involved in a different courtship...

[Secret Confessor]

So. . . . I think I'm scared.

See, I fear I might be falling for someone, and. . . well, I'm not used to that. Not sure what I'd want to happen, or not happen, and. . . . I fear commitment, but, I can't get the person of my mind. I just. . . . don't know whats wrong with my mind. I know the right, or rather the more logical thing would be to ignore it, wait for it to pass, but. . . . that's not happening, and . . . . this is getting ridiculous. I can't follow my own advice, anymore, and things are seemingly getting worse. Now, it feels like I can no longer follow my own advice, or actually do what I know I should. >.<'

I'm not some much asking for advice, as just needing to get this off my chest. v.v

I suppose I'm just confused, and. . . torn, between mind and foolish emotions that refuse to shut up, but. . . they've been strong enough to get me to consider things that had been otherwise impossible, so. . . .

Bleh, I think I just needed to rant aloud about this, and show another living soul.

Thank you all for being here, I love you all. ^.^

[Lamp Post]

*understands. . . . more than one could possibly know*
Especially the whole scared thing. Only I was more fearing that I might be scared of it, and, well. . . . I've rather just tried to ignore the topic. v.v


Good luck with everything. It sounds like what you're going through is. . . .complicated, that or I find it complicated. Sounds rough, anyways. I sincerely hope everything works out for the best.

Just. . .remember, what might seem like the best thing in the present, might not be the best thing in the long run, so. . . try to let things play out before you freak out. Like. . . .like. . . Paris, almost, only I hope you'll get a better ending.

Good luck.

[Megan (Fishy)]

*really, really late* *just now sees this*

Good luck. *hugs* (Good luck to you, too, Lamp.)

[Lamp Post]

(Meh, I'm more or less over it, or that's what I've told/convinced myself into believing. Just. . . . it's weird realizing what you fear most I guess. Which is what I learned, I suppose. I most fear weakness, vulnerability, and. . . well, I most fear, fear. Which is. . . kinda odd, almost. -shrugs-)

[Megan (Fishy)]

*has done that before* *understands that* I'm, quite honestly, afraid of the whole "falling in love" thing you hear people talk about, for that reason. According to everyone else, it makes you even more vulnerable and emotionally trusting to that person than you even are with your closest friends... and I don't want anyone to have that power over me. If that makes any sense. *issues*

[Lamp Post]

XD Really?

*laughs*

Exactly.

Yeah, especially the whole power thing. *has issues* *especially power issues. . . . .*

[Megan (Fishy)]

Yes.

Certain friends already have way too much power over me, emotionally. I can't really fathom how one person could solely hold even more power than that, and don't really care to test it. Unfortunately it's probably inevitable, and with my stubbornness it'll be destined for failure.

[Lamp Post]

XD My friends don't have that kind of power over me. Unless, of course they put up an amazing argument, I get something out of it, enough people agree with them, etc. Very few people can ask me to do something that I wasn't planning to do and get their way. . . . xD

XD *terribly stubborn*
Meh, that could save you. . . . it's not always a terrible problem.
*laughs* Unless someone's introducing you. My mate was introducing me to some of his friends and it ended with 'and finally she's rather hardheaded, stubborn, and generally disagreeable at times.'

[Megan (Fishy)]

I.... am usually stubborn and don't listen to what people want me to do, but.... Not that it's something I like for people to know, because then they might use it against me, but certain people can get me to do pretty much anything just by asking a certain way. *really, really pathetic*
Oh, and it only works from close friends, not at all from others, but I can be a complete sucker for guilt trips. >.<'
XD