Itex ARG

[EndOfTheEarth]

ARG --- Alternate Reality Game

A project to recreate Itex-era documents showing the rise of Itex as a company, and the creation of the Maximum Ride characters. Initial discussion on "What are you doing" thread starts HERE.

The story will chronicle Elena Mueller (known by her internet alias "Valentine") after her return from a trip to Germany, and the discovery of the various Itexicon files.

(I'll start updating this OP over the weekend to start compiling the files)

[EndOfTheEarth]

XD
Booze night at Itexicon, anyone?

[nathan_p]

I was actually just thinking about that, too >.> Out of my brain. Shoo.

...Marian would be a lampshade-on-head dancer, I think. Ter Borcht just sounds more and more like Gorbachev, terminating, possibly, in either a Very Serious diatribe on footie... or one on those goddamn kids and their ficken dog.

I was almost expecting at some points to hear "*bang* *bang* VE VILL BURY DEM!"

[EndOfTheEarth]

It's beautiful!

It's great to hear the whole thing together at last, and it was weird; towards the end of the conversation the pace actually picked up accordingly, even though none of us were actually in the same room.

If you want, I can re-record it and upload it later this week (College still exists :P) but with maybe some scratching toward the beginning, we'd have a very good sounding file here!

Good! I was worried that I'd sound unconvincing, considering that my main sources were Dr. Strangelove, Hans Landa, and some youtube explanation.

[nathan_p]

Re-recording would be great.

I could hear Hans Landa loud and clear XD I myself have bad trouble with my gutturals... and I managed to pick up a slight East German accent. Of all things.

[nathan_p]

A rather goofy memo concerning property damage caused by the flock.

Part one can be taken seriously... part two is a just-between-us sort of communique. Once I started I couldn't stop.

I thoroughly apologize in advance... especially for the name. It sounds familiar, so I fear I stole it from someone.
----
MEMO RE. PROPERTY DAMAGE -- EYES ONLY

The Board of Directors has come to a final decision regarding the matter of avian hybrid group Delta: all six subjects are to be terminated on sight. There will be no reprieve from this decision.

Director of North American Affairs, Ms. Anne Walker, put forth much indisposable evidence to the fact that Delta has caused much more monetary and property damage to Itex and its affiliates than can be excused by any traits they possess. Doubtless this will be a setback to a few of our research teams; however, samples of nervous tissues will be made freely available after Delta group has been retired. Requests for samples of other tissue will be put into consideration, but please submit them through the proper channels.

-- Robert Jenkins, Assistant to Worldwide Director

UPDATE RE. PROPERTY DAMAGE -- EYES ONLY! THIS MEANS YOU!

After being accosted in the halls and receiving an unusual influx of emails, it has been decided that release of the exact types of property damage caused by Delta group would be highly prudent if it gets people to stop hunting me down.

Up to the current date, members of Delta group have caused multiple incidents of damage to Itexicon property. You asked for the list, so here it is, all of it:

- Injuries incurred to Eraser team Gamma during retrieval attempt. Fortunately, recovery was fast, given that most injuries consisted of bruises and sprains. As one medical staff put it, this incident caused us to underestimate Delta group's fighting ability by making their abilities appear to be "weaksauce".

- Youngest subject provoked Dr. Reilly by repeatedly insulting him, his mother, and his chosen profession when Dr. Reilly attempted to obtain a blood sample. Dr. Reilly was reprimanded for striking the subject, and has responded well to antibiotics, causing medical staff to believe that he may be able to keep his hand. (No, you may not see the tapes, and yes, this is why you are required to report any injuries incurred on duty.)

- Destruction of Itex-owned Humvee, accompanied by unexpected termination of two valuable Eraser operatives belonging to Alpha team.

- Psychological damage to leader of Eraser team Gamma, as well as minor injury to remaining members of team, consisting of cactus lacerations and fractured pride.

- Lacerations to leader of team Gamma, as well as other members of the ad-hoc team he had been reassigned to while the rest of Gamma received treatment.

- Cosmetic injury (bruises, teeth knocked from socket) to two employees. One broken jaw. One concussion. Severely fractured ribs. All personnel advised to either arm themselves during further interactions with any member of Delta group, or to simply not get in their way.

- Stress-related early expiration of the valued leader of Eraser team Beta.

- Loss of approximately half a billion dollars in subjects from the New York facility.

- Cervical fracture and further psychological trauma incurred by the leader of team Gamma. Luckily, medical help arrived on scene within minutes after Delta group had left, and we managed to avoid losing a prize subject.

- Multiple minor injuries incurred by members of team Beta when they confronted Delta group unexpectedly. None required more than cursory treatment.

- Minor injuries incurred by team Gamma, who had just returned to duty. It appears they had failed to learn from team Beta's mistakes... or from their own.

- Broken window in Orlando office.

- Explosion damage to experimental sensory deception system in Dade City facility.

- Repeated destruction of robot Erasers.

- Total destruction of parking garage at Death Valley facility, including wholesale destruction of company-owned vehicles, as well as collateral damage to the facility itself.

This disregards the property damage group Delta incurred to other companies or individuals, and the considerable public havoc they created.

Now, the next person to ask me why they can't keep just one member of Delta alive will be fired. You know what they can do. Don't be stupid.

-- Jenkins

[EndOfTheEarth]

ROFL (Especially with regards to poor Reilly).

That was great, I needed that!

If you want, I can try to quickly throw together the pert 1 memo.

[nathan_p]

God knows what kind of mutant-rabies the flock could be carrying >.>

[EndOfTheEarth]

[nathan_p]

\o/

You didn't need to do this, but I like :D

[Omega]

Eeeeeeeepic!

I actually started giggling at this one.




Actually. You know how the book says something about weird gibberish alphanumeric codes? Lets have some weird gibberish alphanumeric codes. Preferably with something in there, like, ever seventh letter spells out 'The Mods Suck?'

[EndOfTheEarth]

We've discussed this already.

[Xuut]

It'd be "coincidental."

And using big fancy words.